your dad once told you that it’s easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission. so, when he pointed out a girl and said, “i’m gonna go over there and say sorry,” you knew it was only a matter of time before he creeped up from behind…

View high resolution

your mom refused to go out yesterday to celebrate sidechick day. like the true classy lady she is, she saved her best dress for a day where her new boo could express his devotion and admiration over a glass of champagne.

these are the lessons learned through observation. you should thank her for setting such a good example.

View high resolution

your mom couldn’t believe that someone tried to steal her “Little Red Riding Hoodrat” swag for the grammys. she was forced to exorcise this beautiful piece from her collection.

View high resolution

your mom recently got her permit to carry a concealed weapon but hasn’t updated her wardrobe with something that will allow her to conceal her six shooter. so, if you see this lady dressed in her othello onesie and rocking a blazer, understand, she’s got a lil’ something something packed away just in case somebody tries to swipe her bottle of Mo’.

View high resolution

your mom went to the open call audition for the live-action version of the Thundercats movie. she’s hoping for a role as Cheetara’s streetwise aunt that helps her to learn how to fight in between running the streets at night.

View high resolution

your mom understands that adding a fine glass of champagne elevates her above the admittedly younger, however, obviously thirstier ladies

View high resolution

your mom figures she spent too much money on these spanx to hide them beneath her savage space age snow leapoard print catsuit.

View high resolution

your mom loves February. it gives her a chance to wear all of her favorite red accessories and pair them with these great white stockings.